The debate

I did not bother translating the debate as, one, I was busy and, two, a lot of others were doing it anyway so there was no point. What stands out in my mind?

On day one, one sentence makes so much sense to me. Abhisit asked them if they would really stand down; that when they campaign, someone is probably going to use the doctored tape again and if that happens, the democrat party would sue them. If that person using the tape was a member of the Pua Thai board, then the party would be disbanded again.

Dissolving parliament now and going for elections under the same rules would just lead to PT being disbanded again and everything would end up right where it is here (or was in September four years ago) again.

On day two, my favourite exchange was regarding the loans. Jatuporn said that Abhisit's government had failed and, among his "reasons" (and I use that term lightly), he said that the current govenment had run up the biggest debt in history. Aside from the very minor detail of a global financial crisis happening, Abhisit said that the biggest loan was actually made by the Government of Thaksin Shinawatra. Jatuporn said that it was to cover the debt made by the previous Democrat government, to which the PM replied, no, it was to cover the debts from the 1997 financial crisis by a government in which Thaksin was deputy PM.

Not that it would matter. Logic and reason matter not in today's world of True Democracy where a committee vote can overrule the laws of mathematics.

How not to upgrade your IT system

When I lost my ATM card in November, my bank gave me a choice to either take our their new secure smart card ATM card or get an old one.


"However, the new card can only be used at our ATMs until the new system is in place in January," I was told. Oh, well that was just a month away then so I went for the new card, only to find that not only did I have to find the orange ATMs, but that half of them did not work either. I could only take money out from new machines, I soon discovered.


It is now the end of March and how has this bank fared?


I thought my card had a problem and went in to ask for it to be replaced, only to be told that "they all are like this."


Apparently the new ATM cards and only be used at new machines with the B-Smart logo on them, not even all of the bank's ATMs and definitely not at other banks' machines.


So, what could I do? I asked the bank manager for guidance.


Apparently the only way is to get an old type magnetic strip ATM card issued. However, because of the problem, this branch and all the nearby ones are now out of the old type cards and they are not getting any more in stock.


"Last week I heard that the branch at Future Park Rangsit still had one," the friendly manager of my local supermarket branch told me, before suggesting that I phone around and check before going or simply keep my passbook on me and go in and get money out from the teller the old way.


One wonders if the CIO still has a job after this event? Of course, it will only effect a few people, those with new ATM cards issued from December up until now. Integrating new technology with legacy software on mainframes is obviously not easy.

Racism versus Nationalism

Both Thaksin and Sondhi have called out to the people saying that there is a difference between nationalism and ultra-nationalism. Maybe a better way to translate it would be, between loving the country and using nationalistic themes to stir up a frenzy.

Perhaps a bit of nationalism is nice, after all in this day of open markets and political correctness, the new generation are being deprived of the concept of being nice to one's neighbour and instead are taught that economics are all; that the lowest price from anyone within the trade area is fine even if it means your local shop goes out of business. But I digress.

Both say the same thing but how do the red shirts feel when Jatuporn rants again and again about the Prime Minister's grandfather coming from Vietnam? How do the Chinese Thais (the sector I feel are the elite, though apparently Thaksin has other ideas) feel when the derogatory word, "Jek" is used to describe them?

In front of the 11th regiment, Jatuporn, announcing the blood letting drive, said that Thai blood would boil and that the Prime Minister's grandfather was Vietnamese. Yes, his Grandfather.

I do not even feel I have to start going into the different shades of nationalism. The PAD's most visible leader was clearly Chinese in name, but not in manner. His Thai was perfect and IMHO Sondhi speaks much better and more proper Thai than Thaksin. At least he can differentiate and pronounce his R's and L's.

PAD's nationalism was more inclusive, about the Chinese, the Muslims, even Farang, everyone who grew up under the royal shade, for lack of a better translation The Redshirt's nationalism is not even nationalism. It is racism. Only pure Thai blood will boil.

This is my opinion. You do not have to agree with me.

RIM's new brand ambassador

Former Prime Ministers make great brand ambassadors. Just look at how much Tony Blair got for his speeches after he left office to make way for Cash Gordon. I wonder how much RIM, that's Research in Motion, the makers of BlackBerry, paid to have Thailand's self-proclaimed champion of Democracy, hero of the peasants and longest serving democratically elected Prime Minister tell his million-strong crowd (according to the organisers) and "hundreds of millions of red-shirted supporters" (according to the PTV anchor in front of the bloodbath at Government House) to use their BlackBerries to watch PTV.

"Press the globe icon, to to AIS and there you can watch PTV and get real information," he said. Obviously True Democracy does not work on Dtac or TrueMove.

It also makes one wonder how much of his ill-gotten billions he will need to pay his phone bill at the end of the month. Roaming data is not cheap and there have been instances of six-digit data roaming charges for someone downloading a TV episode.

If he has nothing to do and nowhere to go (literally on the latter part), our very own Takki could concievably spend most of his day watching his admiring horde on his AIS Blackberry. A million a day? Possible if you do the math. With customers like this, I am sure AIS' revenues will skyrocket soon enough and just think, if he can get every one of the million people at Rachadamnoen road to watch TV on a BlackBerry, AIS' data revenue will skyrocket. Oh, we would have the small detail of the network being overloaded and crumbling into oblivion but that's equality for you. Of course every peasant has a BlackBerry Bold to watch TV.

Last April, the Redshirts fired onto Dtac's offices a dozen times. They claimed that Dtac was harbouring violent Yellowshirt protesters and of course, someone who competes against Thaksin's company is obviously an enemy of democracy.

Takki's been at the BlackBerry theme for two days now. I wonder how much RIM are paying him to go on promoting the device every day. Or rather, I wonder, how much they would be willing to pay him to stop.

Just a random thought off the top of my head.

Listen for yourself. Time 16.00 (or so). Oh, and upon listening to it again, I just noticed he called it a "Back-berry". Someone at RIM should point that out to him. No use having a Brand Ambassador who cannot say the brand clearly. It's almost as if you have a BlackBerry Bold launch in which the emcee keeps pronouncing it as "BlackBerry Bolt". Wait. That did happen, or did it not?

How about an IPTV Channel 3 over WiMAX?

Here's a thought. Analogue TV channels are 6 MHz wide each. That is one more than a 3G W-CDMA channel. If they need three or four channels to cover a country, that's 18 or 24 MHz.

Now the NTC is licensing out 3G licenses with a starting price of 40-ish Billion for a 10 MHz channel for 15 years. Channel 3 is paying 2.4 billion for a ten year extension.

Comparing apples and oranges? Hardly. 700 MHz is used for both 4G standards, LTE and WiMAX. How about a compromise? There is a big difference between 2 billion and 80 billion. How about meeting somewhere in the middle, say pay 40 billion and re-launch Channel 3 as an IPTV over LTE (or WiMAX) as a added bonus to this plan, un-wire up the entire country with wireless broadband while they are at it.

Crazy idea? QB in Cambodia today has IPTV over 3G since last year. 700 MHz will be the LTE frequency of choice for the US of A hence economies of scale will be there.

Like a certain red-panties-advocating madman said yesterday, the world has changed and some people are still stuck in the past. Thinking out of the box could be a win-win situation for all.

Thaksin's anti-Gay comments bring applause.

Yes, I kid you not. Apparently this was a tad too controversial to believe and some people questioned my live Twitter translation, but finally I found a video for all to see and hear and, in most cases, find someone else to translate and confirm what I have already said.

At time mark 10.07 just after saying Abhisit is mentally unstable and does not know spirituality because he grew up overseas (that itself being a classic case of xenophobia) Thaksin says that Abhisit is surrounded by purple people, a common term in Thailand for Gay people.  At 10.14 the crowd bursts into cheer at the homophobic slur by the former prime minister.

Yes, Tweeple, Thailand's longest serving democratically elected prime minister is now reduced to calling his opponents Gay because he has nothing more serious left to say about them.

At 10.21 he said, "and purple people have violence in their emotions." And no, he was not referring to violent emotions, but rather violence in their hearts or else the word order would have been reversed (อารมณ์รุนแรง rather than the มีความรุนแรงในอารมณ์ that he said). I am confident people of good conscience would agree with my translation as I am also sure that people who blindly love Thaksin will have said I made an incorrect, presumptuous, deliberate error in translation.

In case that clip has been removed, two more articles exist that also hit on Thaksin's homophobic remarks here (paragraph 4) and here (paragraph 2).

I believe that Thaksin should be seen for what he is. Many westerners questioned my translation on that one point as combined with the fact that virtually all foreign media ignore it, makes the concept sound too far fetched, like a loony conspiracy theory.

Thaksin condemns the elite for their 19th century thinking, proclaims himself a forward looking icon of the 21st century and keeps using the word equality in his speeches, yet he and his supporters still take glee in the concept of calling the other side Gay. Equality, perhaps then, only for the majority. Minorities such as Gays, those with foreign blood or upbringing (Prime Minister Abhisit has both) or anyone else he happens to disagree with are obviously less equal than others.

Redshirts call for PM's blood

Don't you just love peaceful, non-violent protests? You an almost see the flowers of peace and the hippies in their VW campers make their "V" symbol and say make love, not war, in the Redshirt rally.

To prove just how peace-loving and happy the Redshirts are, check out the words by Redshirt leader Arisman at around 2:32.50 here on UStream http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/5488597

Roughly translated, he sayss, "Tomorrow will be my day. If tomorrow Abhisit does not dissolve parliament, I will go and take your head and wash my feet with your blood. I will go to the PM and Ministers houses and I want to know if their blood is the same red colour as our red shirts."


This was broadcast on 16 March so today Arisman will probably be searching for Abhisit's head to decapitate somewhere in Bangkok. Or he may conveniently forget what he said and move on.


Of course, my translation may be biased, so please find someone (relatively) colour blind to do the translation for you if you do not understand Thai.


Yes, the image of Arisman beheading Prime Minister Abhisit and washing his feet in Abhisit's blood is most non-violent and peaceful. You can almost see the daisies springing up from the pool of blood with birds and bees dancing among the flowers.


Perhaps the only thing that the Thaksinites say that does make sense is that the country is a mess because good people pretend it is not their problem. I say Thaksin is our problem. Wake up and see them for what they are. They are not liberators or saviours, just bloodthirsty thugs who will say anything, act out anything, for a profit.


Violence aside, I am still trying to find the clip where Thaksin himself said something along the lines of everyone around Abhisit being Gay and, as you all know, Gays are violent inside. That particular part seems to have been self-censored from this particular poster's otherwise almost complete archive of the protest. The The next recording starts in the middle of Thaksin's speech, right after the Gay remarks. Perhaps he knew, unlike his leader, that homophobia is not tolerated in Thailand, a land where tolerance and acceptance has earned it the name, the Land of Smiles.


Other notable acts of peaceful protest include one at 2:54 where Adisorn says that ASTV does not count when it comes to peaceful protest and tells the crowd they can do whatever they want to it. Another one, somewhere in there, features former judge Manit saying that peace means it is okay to kill the other side if they kill your side first. Or maybe he was on after Adisorn. Oh, well. I shall not risk my sanity in trying to find it. At 56:50 the emcee says that any left over blood should be poured into Abhsit's spoksperson Thepthai's mouth. I am sure that drinking blood is not safe, even if there is a doctor in the house.

After homophobia, we have xenophobia

Whilst at the 11th regiment, another thought stuck me. Jatuporn was going on and on and on about his usual attacks on Prime Minister Abhisit; that he's a cold-blooded killer (citing the cut and paste audio clip), that he dodged the draft and that Abhisit's grandparents came from Vietnam.

He then went on to say something about how he was 100 percent Thai and his Thai blood, and the Thai blood of all the redshirts would are boiling. That was just before, if I recall correctly, the idea for the river of blood.

Similar racist attacks have been used on PAD leader Sondhi, calling him a "Jek", a derogatory term for Chinese.

Aside from the convenient memory lapse as to the Shinawatra clan's origins, it strikes me that in just a few days of listening to the protests, it is clear that the crazed Redshirt leaders are homophobic, xenophobic and verging on a planned economy socialist as per Thaksin's promise of debt write-off, full employment and a state salary.

At least they have not gone after any religious sect yet, unless you count the Krue Se and Tak Bai massacre of Muslims.

Oh, and do not forget that Takki was also democratically elected, just like someone else who shares most of these traits. Only while the Reds just dislike the Vietnamese, Chinese and Malay, the other guy tried to use eugenics to create a super-race.

This is just my observation. You do not have to agree with me.

Takki's video-link 15 Mar

"Look at my jumper. I'm in Europe. It's cold here," Thaksin said when he started his "video-link" today.

In his link yesterday, he had only a polo-shirt on, which considering the record winter Europe is undergoing is quite something. Maybe the frustration is making his blood boil. So now today he is wearing a cardigan to prove he is in Europe and everyone believes him. End of story.

Well, almost. ASTV went through his video-link frame by frame to see someone in the background doing something on the floor. That someone had a black head and was not dressed like it was mid-winter either. Oh, well. Maybe Thaksin has an eskimo as a personal assistant. You can never discount that possibility.

His rant? Same old, same old, but this time lashing out in particular at his former close aide Somkit Jatusripitak for defecting on the orders of the "Elite".

The country is in a mess because the elite are ordering bureaucrats around and not obeying the rules. Oh, how right. The PAD re-mobilised after Samak transferred the director general of the department of special investigations to stop a probe into Thaksin. Samak also fired the chief of police for the serious offence of calling a subordinate a buffalo.

Well, if that is the standard the Thaksinites want, the redshirts should all be removed for their buffalo (and heel, montor lizard and gay name calling too).

Thaksin didn't make any gay jibes today. But Jatuporn did, before he came up with the loony idea of a million cc of blood. He said that all army generals are gay and they only get promoted by sacrifice their butt to the Elite.

Who said the reds lack entertainment?

Homophobia and the reds

Among the spewing of various farm animals today through the mouth of the redshirt leaders in front of the eleventh regiment, one of MP Jatuporn's comments was that the army was Gay and that the generals had to trade their butt to the elite for promotion.

Homophobia and Gay equality aside, one question is whether it is right or not for the foreign media to overlook these comments. By overlooking such comments (apparently Arisman also called Abhisit as gay in an earlier rally) media are just making the Redshirt leaders look far better than they really are.

Or how about the entire zoo of animal names and diseases hurled at the army today? Everything from buffaloes, monitor lizards to a plague of diarrhea. Oh, and the statement that the army used their heels as a brain too.

Yes, tempers flare, but when a significant portion of a rally is devoted to homophobia and zoophilia, perhaps that should be noted on the record.

Takki's phone-link today

Why people call it a phone link or video link I will never know.

That aside, I listened to it today and there were a few points that linger on in my mind.

With regard to policy, Thaksin said that if he returns, he will get rid of people's debt in the first six months, create universal employment in the next six months and by the 18th month put everyone who wants it on a state salary.

He may be claiming to be the symbol of a Democracy but that is definitely socialist thinking. Well, China has a communist free market economy, so perhaps Takki is thinking of the world's first democratic socialist planned economy.

He also promised a dam to protect Bangkok from rising sea levels. I recall he also one promised an end to traffic jams in Bangkok in TRT's first term.

The other point I found disturbing was his repeated reference to the doctored Abhisit tape. Rather than pretending to argue it's genuine, Takki now says that the tape is doctored to protect the identity of a certain member of the Elite. I wonder who. That said, Abhisit has proven, to my satisfaction at least, that the tape was taken from many parts, including his weekly show, and thus not just a case of cutting one person's voice out.

Finally, it is nice to know that even Takki cannot escape the homophobic anti-gay rhetoric his Reds have been whipping up all week. "The Elite is not married and does not have sons and daughters, but we do and need True Democracy for them."

To be continued...

New GT200 Android App released

Cyberspace's most famous social critic @Sugree Phatanapherom has released an Android version of the GT200 magic wand bomb detector.

Unlike the million-Baht version used by the authorities in the land of smiles, this one comes for free and has a number of substance cards that are much more advanced than Global Technical's own version of the GT200. For instance, not only can it detect bombs, but it can detect bombers too with the addition of artificial intelligence algorithms that read psionic waves, all with the exact same level of certainty that we have learned to expect from a physical GT200.


The new GT200 app is now available in the Android Market

Unlike the overpriced physical UK-made version, this version is made 100% in Thailand, thus allowing all of the kickback, estimated to be at 99.995%, to remain within the local economy (or by extension, the Cambodian and Dubai economies) rather than the 94% of the official version.

Speaking at the official launch, Army Commander General Anupong said that he was delighted that Made in Thailand now means something again and sources confirm that he has dispatched his tree-skimming blimps with the purchasing committee to Mr Sugree to negotiate the military licensing of the Android GT200.

"This device is too powerful for us to allow it to fall into the hands of the elite who might understand it," he said.

Analysts expect the Army to buy tens of thousands of licenses of the new Android GT200 app, which are to be shipped via airship through a secret path taking the procurement officers through London, Paris, Tokyo and New York so they can evade detection and do some shopping en route.

However, a leading primary school quantum mechanic, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said that she expects that the number of Android devices available to run it in the army will be in the single digits. "The words smart and army cannot exist in the same sentence without triggering a quantum cascade in the GT200 pixel shader units that if left unchecked, could lead to a new big bang and the end of planet earth," she said, before noting that perhaps the cascade might be lessened by the fact that we were talking about "smartphones" and not "smart soldiers".

Meanwhile, the developer is reported to be adding a number of new substance cards to the device, the first one for @thaksinlive, guaranteed to work with the same level of certainty that everyone in the Deep South is now used to. When finished and launched on the Android Market, this card will allow the likes of @pm_Abhisit and @KornDemocrat to sleep soundly at night with the same level of confidence the Global Technical GT200 has bought to Yala, Pattani and Narathiwas.

Stuck in Thailand, having a foot massage

I was in an interview today with a spokesperson of a certain big (red) company whose identity is totally beside the point when news filtered in of the internal security act on 11-23 filtered in. What took me by surprise was the response from the spokesperson, who obviously had no idea of the dynamics of Thai politics.

He said that he was stuck at the airport when the protesters were there for what felt like a peaceful sit-in and didn't feel scared at all. He ended up waiting to fly out of the country at Koh Samui (or was it another island resort) and had to tell his colleagues that he was having a foot massage by the beach when everyone kept calling to check if he was alright.

I did not tell him that this upcoming set of protesters were a bit different from the previous set. He was flying out on Wednesday so better let him enjoy his stay in Bangkok blissfully unaware of the brewing storm.

Sugar rationing

As if we needed more proof that the country is spiraling towards a tough landing, the ministry of commerce has imposed sugar rationing. People cannot buy more than 2kg of sugar at a time and anyone with more than 2kg caught stockpiling sugar without ministerial approval will find themselves in trouble.

No matter.

An interviewee on ASTV, a sweet vendor buying ingredients, said, "It's not a big problem. I just have to queue up twice to buy the sugar I need."

Sometimes I wonder why we need this big ministerial announcement when all that is needed to circumvent them is getting in the queue twice instead of once.

Cosplay at Erawan is back

I went to a Qualcomm event today at the Erawan's Campus business / function centre and I am glad to report that the cosplay girls are back.

Themed business centres have been all the rage in recent years to make business meetings, and in my own case, press conferences, all the more interesting. The Sheraton has the Library. The Erawan had (since a while back) the Residence - a kitchen / living room style set of function rooms, to name but a few.

But late last year, the Erawan opened the Campus in a renovated B1 level. It was, as its name suggested, modelled after a 70's US high school and all the hotel staff were dressed in schoolgirl costumes complete with blazers (with a big E logo for the Erawan) and the rooms being classrooms. Oh, and refreshment was US style too to reflect the 70's (or was it 60's). However, soon after that, the Campus' staff reverted to their original hotel uniforms. Probably some thought it was improper to have grown women (and men) dress up as schoolgirls.

But the good news is that as of today, they are back.

Sign me up for every press conference at the Campus from now on, dear PR horde. Piccies next time - this time I was running late and had to deal with the prospect of a 50 year old PR manager hugging me as per his client's request due to a certain interview I had with his big, big boss. Sigh. Make that a 50 year old male PR too.

On a side note, the annoying security searches of one's bags were also removed. Guess someone finally came to their senses that it makes no sense from a security stnadpoint rummaging through purses if you allow visitors in with suitcases. The only thing that achieves is annoying legitimate visitors.

To appeal or not appeal, that is the question.

One problem that our old friend Thickskin Shinybutt (read that out loud, fast) is facing that nobody seems to be talking about is the dilemma he is in whether he should appeal the recent supreme court judgement seizing his assets or not. It is not just a case of whether lodging an appeal would be accepting the court's jurisdiction, but one of the Redshirt's core values (apart from money) regarding the constitutions.

If I recall correctly, the 2540 constitution introduced this special court to try politicians, a one-shot court with investigative (Italian-style) powers to speed up trials of politicians. However, the 2550 constitution felt that a one-shot court was not very nice and allowed for appeal. It made appeal possible, albeit to the same court (which some reds argue is a distinction without a distinction) so that if new evidence could be put forward, the same court (with a different mix of judges) could hear out the appeal.

The issue then is that if Takki is to stick to his demand for a 2540, he must not appeal. But of course he wants to appeal to drag things out as long as he can and hope that the next government will do something to get him back into power.

Ah, the dilemma.